


Fireworks

by AurigaCapella



Series: Recovery [2]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-15
Updated: 2017-11-15
Packaged: 2019-02-02 01:28:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12716922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AurigaCapella/pseuds/AurigaCapella
Summary: Connie walks Steven through a calming exercise when a loud fireworks display triggers some unpleasant emotions.





	Fireworks

**Author's Note:**

> While this story could stand alone, it builds on themes I wrote about in Steven & Vidalia, found here: http://archiveofourown.org/works/12678795.

Dad and Amethyst said they’d chaperone a trip into town for the fireworks, but Steven and Connie agreed to stay in to watch _Under the Knife_ instead.

They were two episodes in and Steven had just gotten really comfortable when a series of loud pops startled him. He quickly bubbled himself and Connie. “What was that!”

Connie yawned. “Fireworks. It’s the Fourth of July, remember? No bubble needed.”

“Umm, I’ll… uhh,” said Steven. He dropped the bubble.

The bangs continued, accompanied by little flashes of light. He clenched his fists and scanned the room.

Connie tapped on his shoulder. “Steven… can we talk for a moment?”

Steven paused the TV. “Of course. Did I do something wrong?”

“Not exactly. It’s just I’ve noticed you’ve been having trouble with loud noises lately. Maybe flashing lights too.”

“Huh. Have I?”

“Yeah. When we went to the _Lonely Blade_ movie, during the scene with the cannon, you hid your face in my shoulder. I didn’t mind, but you missed a big part of the plot. Then you bubbled your dad’s entire van that time a firetruck drove past us. And now, with the fireworks.”

“Oh.” _And that band rehearsal where the amp feedback made me bubble Buck and Jenny_. “Yeah, I guess that’s kinda been a problem for me since I got back.”

Connie nodded. “I understand, but I want to remind you that you aren’t on Homeworld anymore. It’s ok to let your guard down a little.”

Another loud rumble echoed around the room and Steven’s entire body tensed. Connie studied him. “There it is again.”

He was disturbing her. Tears formed at the edges of his eyes. “I’m really sorry, I know it makes it harder to concentrate on the show. If you want I can-.”

“Don’t be sorry. The show isn’t the important thing here,” said Connie. “Let’s think of a way to solve this instead. Had Vidalia given you any ideas?”

“We haven’t gotten into the sound thing yet, but I’ll write it in my journal for next time.”

“Hmm. Well, there’s something I’ve learned that we could try.” Connie reached for his hand. “Stop me if this makes you uncomfortable. It’s something I do with my dad, or sometimes on my own, when I can’t stop thinking about something bad. It sort of builds on what we worked on with Garnet that time. We’re going to start by thinking of three things we can see in the room.”

Steven took a breath and looked around. “Uhh. Let’s see, there’re some video games. The _Under the Knife_ title screen on the TV.” He struggled to tune out the bangs. Each flash felt like a Shattering Robonoid scanning him. _Stay in the moment_. “Uhh, and behind you there’s a picture of you. Double Connie!” He smiled.

“Good. How about three things you can hear, that aren’t the fireworks?”

 “The waves... your voice.” Another loud boom, and the image of Lars’ body striking rock, then crumbling to the ground. Steven closed his eyes and tightly gripped Connie’s hand.

“That’s ok,” said Connie. “Concentrate on other sounds, things that prove you’re right here, with me, in Beach City.”

“Right. Umm.” He took a deep breath. “Oh! Our breathing. I can hear both of us breathing.”

“Yes, that's three! Now what about three things you can feel?”

“Soft bed,” he said. _None of those on Homeworld_. “Cozy blankets. Your hand in mine.”

“Right again,” said Connie. “Remind me, where are we?”

“My bed, my bedroom, my house.”

“Good. More generally?”

“Beach City… Delmarva.” He took a deep breath. "Earth.”

“And what are we doing?”

“We’re watching _Under the Knife_. Then we’re gonna have a sleep over, and in the morning Dad’s gonna take us fishing.”

Connie squeezed his hand. “See? It’s ok, nothing to be afraid of. It's just us here and we're safe.”

They turned the show back on and Steven felt his breathing even out. The booms sounded more like distant pops. He concentrated on the drama on the screen, his comfortable bed, and the feeling of Connie’s hand in his. Small pleasures available only right here in Beach City, Delmarva, Earth.

After a moment a new series of explosions erupted. He bit back the urge to bubble himself again and instead turned and pressed his face into Connie’s shoulder.

“Still just fireworks,” said Connie. She reached her other arm around him. “I know that was disturbing.” She paused a moment. “For New Year’s, we can stay at my house. No fireworks there, ok?”

Steven felt himself shiver despite the warm July air and Connie's embrace.“I used to love the Fourth of July and New Year’s Eve,” he whispered. “They were so much fun, all the colorful light, and the sounds, and everyone together…”

“We can still get everyone together. The people are the important part.”

“Do you think they’ll understand?”

“I know they will. They understood you wanted to stay in tonight, maybe they even guessed why. I had a feeling.”

Steven’s jaw quivered. “I’m sorry. Did you only say you didn’t want to go to the fireworks because of me? I’m so embarrassed, you really don’t have to change your plans just because I was avoiding something. I didn’t even realize I was avoiding it. I'll make it up to you, do you still want-.”

Connie held him tighter. “Things changed for me too,” she murmured. “Some things probably forever, and some things only for a while, but we’ll get through it together. Did I tell you I had to leave chemistry class the other day? We were working with sulfur.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. And the smell didn’t used to bother me; I’ve been doing chemistry labs for a while. But this time it just overwhelmed me and I had to get out.” Connie sighed. “It made me think about how the ship that took you away smelled. I couldn’t stop thinking about watching the door close. How powerless I felt, how I just went limp and Garnet had to carry me back to shore.”

“Connie-”

“I told my mom and she was pretty unhappy. Not mad at me, or anything, just sad. She’d been planning to surprise me with a trip to Hawaii for spring break. We went before, when I was seven, and I loved exploring the volcanoes. But now, with the whole sulfur thing… we’re going to go somewhere else instead.”

“I’m so sorry,” said Steven.

Connie shrugged. “Not your fault, just one of those things. You and fireworks, me and volcanoes. It doesn’t mean we can’t be happy without those experiences.”

Another dazzling flash filled Steven’s small bedroom, along with the sound of dozens of separate fizzes and bangs. His breath hitched. 

“Hey, I think this is the last bit, but it might be pretty loud for a while,” said Connie. “Do you maybe want to fuse? I don’t think Stevonnie will be as bothered, since fireworks aren’t triggering for me.”

Steven sniffled and managed a muffled “yes.” Connie gently pressed her forehead against his. He felt a warm glow spread from his core.

Now Stevonnie was here, and with them, a little peace.

**Author's Note:**

> This idea grew out of Steven's reaction to Greg getting entangled with that hose in Gemcation (immediately biting through the hose instead of slowly detangling it and then saying "are you good, are you safe, do you still love me?"). Given Steven's experiences, hypervigilance seems like a real possibility.


End file.
